


How-to no Darugon

by SleeplessSquad



Category: How to Train Your Dragon (Movies)
Genre: Also caricature of shonen anime, F/M, Guys this is crack I promise, Shonen anime! AU, Snot's a textbook shonen protagonist, how could i not
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-29
Updated: 2020-08-29
Packaged: 2021-03-07 00:00:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,440
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26167552
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SleeplessSquad/pseuds/SleeplessSquad
Summary: The Shonen anime adaptation of Httyd no one asked for but Swirly wants let’s goAuthor: Wine
Relationships: Astrid Hofferson/Snotlout Jorgenson
Comments: 1
Kudos: 4





	How-to no Darugon

**Author's Note:**

> Y'all I know that not all shonen anime is bad. I just wrote this as a caricature of the genre for laughs. It's not a comment on everything in the genre, just all of the most overused tropes piled together into a hot mess without anything else like characterization or plot to save it.

So first: The character that screamed “Shonen anime protagonist” to me was Snotlout. For simplicity’s sake, he’s kinda going to be in Hiccup’s place but also not really. A shonen-friendly version of Hiccup’s place.  
So: Rundown on what this means: A shonen anime is an anime aimed at young boys. The main protagonist usually is an excellent fighter, sometimes popular, loves food, and always looks for a good fight, usually at the expense of practicality or the surrounding area (Think of Dragon Ball Z being obsessed with “fighting at 100%” despite the fact that it pretty regularly decimates the surrounding area).  
So. I’m going to basically make this a caricature of a shonen anime(I know there are good ones, I’m just going to deliberately go over-the-top) which means good-bye good characterization. 

So. Story opens with Snotlout on the water brigade. Cue opening monologue about how Snotlout wants to be the greatest warrior in the entire world to defend his home! But he needs to get stronger, and the only way to do that is to shoot down a monstrous nightmare!  
Welp. To do this, he goes to the forge and takes the mangler from his good buddy Hiccup (because shonen anime protagonists are loved by everyone, so Hiccup’s 100% down to letting Snot use this) and Hiccup’s gonna say something like “Only the best warriors can use this. That’s why I can’t, and so I’m entrusting it to you.”  
So Snot takes it to the ridge and shoots down the monstrous nightmare.  
Hiccup is unrealistically clumsy, so he knocks something over which catches on fire and Snotlout saves him and everyone cheers for Snot, except Astrid, who scoffs and turns away muttering that she’s going to be the best. She just needs to get stronger.  
And hey. Let’s throw some inner conflict in here! Stoick says that Hiccup’s not fit to be heir but he can choose the next one. So Hiccup says that the heir should be his good buddy Snotlout. Stoick says that Snotlout must prove himself the best dragon killer in the world to be heir, which is something Snotlout desperately wants. Hiccup does not feel resentful about this development at all.  
Snotlout goes off into the forest to look for the monstrous nightmare he shot down. (I’m just gonna call him Hookfang now, cause that’s who it is obviously) He finds Hookfang waiting in a clearing, completely free and completely fine. Hookfang roars at him. Despite not speaking dragonese, Snotlout somehow understands that being shot down was an affront to his honor and that Hookfang was waiting here to challenge him and prove once and for all that he, Hookfang, is the strongest. Snotlout says, “Heh, so being shot down was an affront to your honor and that you were waiting blah blah blah?” How Snotlout got all of that from a furious roar is never explained.  
Snotlout gets tossed into a few trees. Then we see flashbacks of Hiccup saying that Snotlout is the strongest and that Hiccup thinks Snotlout alone deserves to be heir because he’s so much stronger than Hiccup. Snotlout thinks “I can’t lose! I’ve got people depending on me!” And he wins through the power of friendship. Hookfang nods at him in recognition of Snotlout’s strength, and they are besties now. 

So the training/ building montage in the movie happens here. It consists of: everyone else getting hurt in dragon training (usually Hiccup because he’s weak and clumsy) and Snotlout seeing red and winning through the Power of Friendship.  
The dragons are not upset at all by this and now admire him very deeply and want to become stronger to fight alongside him. Because that makes sense.  
Astrid never gets hurt in training, and she always scoffs and glares at Snotlout. She is tsundere.  
Snotlout is chosen for the honor of killing the night fury, which took movie hookfang’s spot. A huge deal is made about how usually the dragon is a monstrous nightmare, and Snotlout’s lucky it’s a night fury because they’re the strongest dragons alive and the honor of killing one goes to him.

Then the famous nest flight happens. Snotlout is alone. When he gets back to the cove, he clenches his fist and vows to protect the dragons from such a monster! But he needs to be stronger! He also has some emotional turmoil over whether he wants to save the dragons and lose the heirdom, or keep the heirdom and protect his friends at the cost of not helping the dragons.

The morning of the final exam, Snotlout faces Toothless. Toothless lunges. Snotlout fights valiantly. He pins Toothless and screams “I’m trying to help you!! I want to be friends!” Then he punches Toothless in the face. No other Viking heard him somehow.  
Toothless stops and looks at him. Then he nods his head. Snotlout drops his weapons. Stoick and the Vikings jump in, pin Toothless down, and hit Snotlout with a bola.  
Snotlout is dragged to the great hall to be interrogated by the chief. 

He immediately says that there’s a giant monster controlling the dragons on the nest, but you need a dragon to get to it. Stoick believes him and takes Toothless.

Snotlout tells Hookfang to go to the arena while he collects the other teens except Hiccup.  
Snot pairs them up how they are in the movie. Astrid scoffs and glares at him, but she also blushes.  
Right before they take off, Hiccup runs in saying he’s tired of being saved and he wants to get stronger and defend his tribe, too! Snotlout says “ok, you can ride the night fury i guess” and gives Hiccup a ride into battle.  
On the way the teens ask what the plan is. Snotlout says “Protect the tribe! Give ‘em everything you’ve got!” Everyone cheers and ignores the fact that this is not a plan.  
Snotlout drops Hiccup off on the boat to free Toothless. Hiccup pulls desperately on Toothless’ chains. Then, the boat sinks like it did in the movie except while he’s underwater, Hiccup pulls some nifty gadget out of his pocket and frees Toothless really quickly. They fly up together and manage to blow off half of the Red Deaths’ crown-spike-coral-lookin thing in one ridiculously powerful blast that no one wonders why Toothless didn’t use to break out. Also, this shot only serves the purpose of making Hookfang’s shot later look more destructive by comparison.

Except the Red Death shoots Hiccup down. Through bad storyboarding, all the other riders have vanished as well.  
Snotlout sees Hiccup lying on the ground minus one leg with Stoick stoically crying over him. There’s like a five minute montage of Snotlout’s stricken face, Hiccup’s body, and past memories of Snotlout and Hiccup playing together when they were like five, and Snotlout promising that they’ll be Best Friends and that Hiccup will be smart and invent amazing things and Snotlout will protect him.  
This montage goes on for a loooong while.  
Then we cut to a power-up shot of Hookfang unlocking some Monstrous Nightmare Mega Fire God Rage Blast or something, which the Red Death dodges but still gets dealt a whole heck ton of damage, and completely destroys the volcano. If the Vikings hadn’t gotten forgotten by the animators, surely they’d all be dead!  
But they were, so they’re fine.  
“DID YOU THINK THAT COULD DESTROY ME?!?!?!” The Red Death roars and then starts laughing.  
That took most of Hookfang’s strength. But the Red Death is still standing, so Snotlout grabs a hammer and gets Hookfang to fly above the Red Death. Snotlout jumps off of Hookfang from a height that anyone looking to commit suicide via jumping would consider overkill.  
While he’s falling (and this montage is also like 5 min) the screen switches between him falling and yelling with the hammer raised above his head, Hiccup, the rest of the village, tender caring moments between Snot and Hookfang we’ve never seen before this, etc.  
Finally, Snotlout falls to the Red Death (who is still laughing) and hits him with the hammer. This strike is shown five times and from three different angles because it’s important.  
The Red Death’s entire head blows up.  
It staggers around and falls dead. Snotlout cheers then passes out.  
He wakes up back on Berk (he has both legs) and walks out to everyone congratulating him. Astrid, who has never shown any actual interest besides blushing, suddenly kisses him and they’re dating now. Hiccup is also runnin around on a fully robotic leg you’d see in Star Trek or something.  
Also Snotlout gets named heir. Almost forgot that part.


End file.
